Soo.. I'm finally blogging.
I haven't been cutting in ages. I've stopped it.
I don't know why I'm blogging actually. I wonder if you still views my blog. I wish you still care sometimes. But, you're a million times better without me. To you, I'm still worthless pierce of crap. No matter how many times you said that you cared, that you'd never leave me, you still did.
I always wish that I could turn back time, then maybe I'd cherish you more. But then.. Things would be a whole lot different now right?
I remember when you used to care, I remember when you were my best friend. I remember those surprise gifts from you. I remember those sweet messages. I remember every damn bloody thing. But the question is, do you remember everything? Do you?
Are you happy now, without me, sweetheart?
'I'll always be here for you.'
Bull fucking shit. Everyone who says this, all fucking left. Like I was fucking worthless. Oh wait, I am. (:
Everyone left, just promise me you won't.
I remember last year & all the time I thought of suicide. What if I had done it? Then I'd probably never meet you. So I don't regret it. I don't regret not killing myself.
But.. If you looked at my body, I probably won't be good enough for you. Scars all over my thigh. Big ugly scars. Some faded to small white lines.
I'd probably never be good enough for you. You're too good, baby.. I don't deserve you but I'm that selfish to not push you away..
But I don't deserve to be happy.