It's 12 am and I can't sleep. I studied & give up..

Had sucha bad day again.

'is it okay to be jealous of your good friend?'

'Yes. But don't let it ruin the friendship.'

Yea, I'm trying really hard to not let this ruin the friendship. Honestly, it prob won't. Cause when I fell for you, that voice had alr warned me. This is what I'm gna go through. 

I knew I wasn't good enough from the start.

I hate it when I treat someone do importantly & they just treat me like I'm completely worthless.

Maybe I'm no longer important to you. Maybe she is now. Well, things change. From the most important person in your life to completely nothing.

I hate feeling this way. Like I'm so pathetic. I'm so worthless. I really am huh. I can't help but think I'm worthless no matter how many people tell me I'm not. They don't understand what is it that I feel. That emptiness, the darkness. It sucks yknow.

Worthless little girl.

I'm really good for nothing. I can't seem to be able to do anything good. I mean like, no matter how hard I try, I'm just not good enough. Never am I good enough.

Not skinny enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough, not strong enough. No one understands. Don't really bother telling my probs to anyone is cause no freaking one understands. They might say they do. But they don't. How could they understand a girl who bleeds to feel better? How?

For 9.8 for shuttle run. Idk if it's my daddy fingers or the timer. Trevor didn't believe I got that fast. Well, I understand. I'm not good enough.

Dying, she gave her last smile to the world who has been so unkind to her.

I completely understand why no one would fall for me, why no one would give me a second look. I wouldn't too. If I were 'em. I'm just not good enough.

I sound so attention seeking here. But no one understands how painful it is to be surviving, be looking into the mirror. I mean, no one looks in the mirror & cry cause they're so disgusted with their fats & looks. Well... 

Promise me you won't give up.