So it's like 2am & I still can't sleep..
What's wrong with me. Keep being awake at night & sleeping in the afternoon. Shit this.
The air con's so cold right now.. Haha
Daniella came back. I missed her so so much.
Stop making me think I've a chance.
I hate falling for someone. I mean, what. Why would you want to let yourself get hurt over & over again? Why would you give your damn 'love' to someone just to watch that person not appreciating it & ignoring it. Why would you allow yourself to be tortured? I mean, if given a choice, I wouldn't fall for anyone at all.
Stop smiling, it's making my heart melt.
Friendships? Damn it.
'You scare of pain not ah?'
'Not la. She cut herself, scare what siah.'
'You can just get over it right.'
'Just don't cut la.'
Damn you, girl. Why not you be me & tell me how easy it is to get rid of an addiction? Why don't you get addicted to it too & tell me how you'd get over it.
& who the damn hell would tell a girl who wants to die so badly that she can just get over it? Who can tell a girl that's so depressed to just get over it? You, only you.
I've been trying to close an eye to whatever you do to me alr. I've been trying for damn bloody long alr okay. I'm done.
Whenever you're with YiJuin and Isabel isn't there, you'd completely ignore me. What, so I'm invisible now? :O Oh I didn't know I've a new super power. Whenever you attitude me, I try to just ignore it with a damn smile. What's wrong with you? You were one of my good friend & yet you do this to me? How could you? Now I understand why they didn't like you then.
'She damn insensitive.'
What, so saying 'wah, you haven't finish studying?' to you on a damn exam day is called insensitive? Woah :O I didn't know. Lol.
Whenever you look left out, I try to go & talk to you. Whenever you're moody, I'd try & cheer you up. Whenever you're walking alone, I'd stop & walk with you. Yknow why? Cause I know how it feels. I know how it feels to be so damn alone you'd break down. I know. I've been through it so I'm trying to let you not experience it.
And damn, what do I get back for that? 'She's so insensitive.'
'Your taste damn bad lerh.'
'Eww eww eww.'
Will you please bloody shut the hell up? Everyone has different taste. Why can't I find this guy cute? It just means I see things differently. So what if the whole damn world agrees with you? Would you bloody like it if someone keeps insulting your taste? No. Though it stopped, but it's still damn insulting okay. & we both know if I put Kohei Uchimura as my wallpaper, we all know what you're gna say.
Why me?
Perhaps you haven't notice it. But I did okay. The only damn person you'd vent anger on or attitude is me. Esp when you're with 'em. But damn girl, when you're alone with me, you become damn nice. I don't freaking understand.
Wna know why I stopped talking?
Idw to cut in to any of your conversations. Idw to hear you bitch me. Idw to hear whatever insulting thing you've to say. Idw to. It's damn irritating.
I'm gna stop talking to you unless you ask me a question now. I'm done trying to tolerate you. I'm done. Idw to end up quarrelling with you & getting YiJuin & Isabel involved. There's no point. Let's just stop talking then. Since you dislike me so damn much.
Did you know?
Did you know how much I cry when I found out? Did you know how hurting it was for me when I realised it's you? Did you know how much I drifted from everyone else because of you? Did you know how sad I was? Did you know how damn disappointed I was? Did you know I no longer wish to try & start a conversation anymore.
Now you know why I totally stopped talking.
Are you happy?
Friends? Honestly? I think they'd all leave sooner or later & it's so damn tiring to hold on.