Currently in class. Cried a little again. Why am I so fucking weak.
He likes Shanya. Doesn't he? I should have known, should have realised it. But I didn't. How stupid. All the hints. The clues. How could I not known? I remember so many times, so many hints, clues. It's ip till now, everything makes sense. Combing her fringe, playing wiyh her hair, poking her tummy. How the fuck did I not known?
My eyes hurts, but I feel like crying even more. Just fucking break down. Who cares anyway? Who. I'm weak alr. I can't be strong anymore. It hurts. So so badly... I wish I can just grab that penknife & kill myself. But cutting doesn't solve anything. Yea, I finally realise it. It justs hurting yourself. But what if, one day, I can't take it anymore & just cut myself again. That thought kinda scares me.
Yien's right. He'd end up destorying me. Slowly killing me. & idw that to happen. I hate being in class. Cause everytime, I'd hear her name coming out of his mouth & it kills me. I wish I can just block out his voice that mentally kills me again. Kymberly's right. 'So many good guys around, you fell for a flirter. Dumb ah you. Tsk' Aren't I dumb.
There's sure to be so many other guys around & I fall for him. Him. Fuck.
There's still Shanya. Yiling said 'the day will come when Shanya stops talking to Cheryl' I guess that day came. She left me once again.... ��